‘Poor Whiny Govt. Workers’: Therapy Dogs Head to Capitol To Comfort Stressed Staffers

As the impeachment inquiry and now trial continues, it’s good to know that the mental health and well being of lawmakers and staffers in the capital is being taken care of, even if nothing else in the nation is.

Apparently, it’s rather hard work coming up with lie after lie and forging half-baked documents that seek to take down our president, not to mention stressful. And this stress is so apparent that several pet advocacy groups have come together to provide some much-needed stress release by bringing therapy dogs to Congress.

No, we aren’t kidding.

An animal therapy organization known as Pet Partners has teamed up with the pet industry lobbying group Pet Industry Joint Advisory Council to bring the much-needed dogs to both the Rayburn House Building and the Hart Senate Office Building, according to The Hill.

It is noted that the Capital did not request such guests to be brought to Congress. Instead, the pet advocates simply offered their services. No doubt, they saw an opportunity to put their names in front of the nation and jumped on it.

The groups stated, “Who better to bring comfort and relief to the hardworking folks on Capitol Hill than a furry group of loving, intuitive, and bipartisan Pet Partners therapy animals?”

Who better, indeed.

Now, we aren’t saying that a job on Capitol Hill can’t be stressful. After all, the people who work in this environment are exposed to non-stop lies, political scams, and an atmosphere that encourages absolutely no loyalty except to oneself.

I’m sure that some sort of stress relief is needed regularly. It’s no wonder, so many congress members seek out inappropriate extramarital activities in an attempt to relieve the pressure that the lies they tell place on them.

Furthermore, we aren’t saying that therapy animals can’t do some good. It has been well-documented and scientifically proven that gentle and friendly animal interactions can have extreme benefits on both the human mind and body. According to PAWS for People and many other sources, pet therapy can lower blood pressure, increase the release of endorphins such as oxytocin that has a calming effect on the body, diminish overall physical pain, and improve cardiovascular health. And that’s just for starters.

However, we just aren’t sure this is precisely what Congress actually needs at this time.

Here we have an impeachment trial going on that could forever change the history of our nation and completely alter how our government performs and is handled. One that is based on lies and falsities that have all but been proven to be false. But instead of coming clean or actually searching for truth, leading Democrats are still probing for something to show that President Trump is unfit for office.

Lie after lie has been told, documents have been altered, and careers ruined all in an attempt to say one party is better than another. And as anyone with a history of falsities knows, the strain of keeping all those up can be excruciating.

We have no doubt they need therapy. Just maybe not from dogs. And the American public agrees. Several Twitter users noted that something else besides pet therapy is required.

One person said, “They need something stronger than therapy dogs.”

Another continued on this route, saying that the cure for Trump Derangement Syndrome or TDS would be something much more influential. They said, “One hopes that therapy dogs lead to actual therapists. Maybe we can cure some TDS on Capitol Hill.”

Let’s just say American doesn’t seem very impressed by the fact that US lawmakers are getting to cuddle with puppies for a few hours just to assuage the pain of their lies.

According to the news release, the animals would be available to comfort lawmakers between the hours of 11 am to 3 pm. You may notice this is squarely in the middle of the workday, a time when most other Americans are busy. But for the capitol, it’s prime break time, I guess.

As one tweet said, “Poor little government workers.”

I mean, it’s not like they could actually be doing anything else with their time. Meanwhile, things like fighting against international terrorism, solving the problems with Iran, handling Chinese repression, figuring out better ways to deal with our southern border, or discussing the never-ending issues with North Korea are entirely ignored.

Poor little government workers, indeed. For God’s sake, quit whining, and do your job.

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